daybookphotoOut my Window: rainy morning, hummingbirds singing and playing in the rain, low clouds hovering in front of our hill

Enjoying: seasonal food, grilling, going into a bookstore, early summer days, eating at the picnic table, wild daisies growing everywhere along the roads and paths, my container plants

Listening to/Watching: Still listening to and loving Lord of the Rings on Audible. I look forward to driving places so I can listen. Listened to a very interesting interview on Revelation from Holy Post. It was a good discussion of how we are prone to wanting to make sense of things, so we lean toward making things about us in Revelation that most likely aren’t, and skip applying the parts that definitely are for us.

Reading: I am diving into A Gentle Answer: Our ‘Secret Weapon’ in an Age of Us Against Them by Scott Sauls. I skimmed some of it for the book launch and review, but knew I needed to come back and slowly read and apply it. 

By my bed: Sacred Endurance: Finding Grace and Strength for a Lasting Faith by Trillia Newbell

Rambling Thoughts: So many thoughts… it has been a rough week watching people that I care about and know, who are good people, recklessly share posts that are not helpful, or just are not true. It has been going on for awhile, but this week felt like I saw the nakedness of people, and the underbelly of ignorance, and the fruit of what systematic racism and cultural prejudice has done to my corner of white, rural American Church. I have been so frustrated and amazed (not in a good way) at the ignorant things shared. It feels like they are on the hunt to prove people wrong, instead of following Christ and humbly listening. We do not need to agree with everything to listen well. I fall short quite a bit. The last bunch of years have been an intensive practice of listening deeply, and asking better questions of all sides. I am far from doing that without consciously thinking about it, but it has helped. But this week I was just too heartbroken to ask why in a humble way to my sisters. I just felt the need to lecture and try to convince. I know that is not the way to reach and change hearts.

One day my flesh side wanted to start flipping tables, and my friend reminded me that some people do not know better. They really have not interacted with these complex issues, so it is our job to connect them with people, and also to gently (my word this year, sigh) educate by facilitating these difficult conversations. We are to help people find their whys, so they can ask themselves better questions. She also gave a great example of why some wonderful people are sharing aggressive posts.  She shared about a little autistic girl she knows, who when her environment gets a lot of commotion and noise she doesn’t understand, she will stand in the middle of the room and start yelling at the top of her lungs because she doesn’t know how to interact with the commotion any differently. She said our friends that are sharing posts that are aggressive, or insensitive are trying to cope, and want things to settle down, so they are shouting down the already noisy place. This made sense to me, although it makes me sad. That is not the example that Christ sets for us. He asks us to be peacemakers and part of the healing. Then God added a study of the book of Jude to convict my heart, the blessing Jude gives to these believers is that they may multiply in mercy, peace, and love. So this is my prayer, first for myself. May God remove the plank in my eye before I go pointing out and trying to help others with their speck. May we all choose to seek and live in the wisdom from above described by James, “But the wisdom from above is first of all pure, then peace-loving, gentle, accommodating, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap the fruit of righteousness.” (3:17-18)

Fitness and Mental Health: Doing pretty good with fitness, moving daily, but still need something a bit more structured. Trying  to figure out a plan for July that is doable. Mental Health: continuing to look for beauty. I enjoy sharing it on Instagram. I enjoy that space and enjoy following people who speak truth and add beauty into our world at the same time.

Home: Finished the last weed pit. Seriously weeds are so aggressive. I went back to my biggest weed pit that had been taken back, and the weeds have returned with a vengeance. The smaller gardens I have been trying to weed while watering, but the big one needs some sort of strategy. Apparently my Biblical philosophy of wheat and tares seems to not work well in flower and veggie gardens, according to friends in the know.

Giving Thanks: my home, provisions, small group studies,  good food,  CHOP peacefully dissipating from Seattle, Amazon Fresh still delivering to my son in Seattle, friends who laugh with me and keep me from flipping tables that are not mine to flip, most excellent beginning of summer weather, flowers, books that are so perfect for this season, serving alongside some wonderful people, generosity and kindness of friends, friends who pray, being back at Church for corporate worship


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